Moms and Pre-Teen Boys

Age ten for most boys is a lovable time. Some have called it an "angelic" period, when cooperation and obedience are at their peak. It will never be quite that way again. By eleven, the typical boy will probably be getting testy and cantankerous. He may irritate his mother, tease his younger brothers and sisters, and push the limits a little farther. That means testosterone is starting to flow and the adolescent upheaval is getting under way. Then come twelve and thirteen. For the next three years, it's "Hang onto your hat!"

The late counselor and author Jean Lush was my guest on the radio some years ago to discuss this subject of mothers and sons. Here is a portion of what she said about the onset of puberty:

Of all the counseling I've done and from my reading I can say ... oh, my, age thirteen can be a hard year. I'll give you an example from our family. This mother noticed her son was in a bad mood and she said, "Oh, do come over and see these photographs and help me choose which one I'll use for Christmas. They're photos of myself." The boy came over and said, "I don't like any of them. Your breath stinks. I'm going to my room." The mother said, "Oh, I was so hurt." But two hours later the boy came out and said, "I love you, Mom." He kissed her and went to bed. Now, this was a typical thirteen-year-old. A boy atthat age will often be rude and nippy. He will scream at his parents, slam doors, and have mood swings. But all of a sudden, he will break out of it and is a lovely member of the family again. These kids between thirteen and fourteen are really hard to figure out.

Book: Bringing Up Boys

By Dr. James Dobson

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