Roger Marsh: Welcome to Family Talk with your host, psychologist, and author, Dr. James Dobson. I'm Roger Marsh, and if you have ever prayed desperately for a child of yours, we have a very encouraging program for you today, especially for the praying moms who are listening to us. We know there are so many obstacles, so many challenges, and so many potential pitfalls in front of your kids these days. It's even harder if your child has walked away from his or her faith. I'll tell you if you're a praying mom, it's enough to wear out a mom's knees. Well, our first speaker today was that prodigal son, and yet his mother never stopped praying for him.
Ty Nichols: God had me under the microscope because my mother was in His ear every day and she wouldn't let God forget about me. Lord, please remember my son. Daily.
Roger Marsh: Now that was Ty Nichols, son of Fern Nichols who's the founder of Moms In Prayer International. He shared his moving testimony in a prerecorded message given at a Moms In Prayer Conference in Dallas, Texas. He offered encouragement to parents who have a child who has walked away from the faith, reminding them that they should never give up loving and praying for their wayward son or daughter. Ty testifies how his mother's fervent persistent prayers helped deliver him from his rebellion through his teenage years and into young adulthood. Here he is now on today's edition of Dr. James Dobson's Family Talk.
Ty Nichols: In my mind, I was it. She was old school, I was new school. She was the old way, I was the new way. Her faith was a crutch, and my life was a trophy. Satan was trying to destroy me and discourage mom. He tried to get her to question God's authority. Can you relate? Tried to crush her spirit because her kids were her most cherished possession. My mother and her prayer warriors charged the battlefield daily to rescue me from the enemy. They were fighting the battle for me and were serious about bringing me back into the loving embrace of God, and I was doing everything I could to keep from it.
Ty Nichols: But thankfully, my mom knew God. No, no, no. She knew God. She knew God. And while I was wasting my life away in rebellion, she stood on the rock of God's promises. You want to talk about being tough, you want to talk about self-sacrifice, you want to talk about endurance, you look no farther than the person sitting to the right or left of you who is praying their son or daughter through the fire. Now that's toughness. For years she stood on the Rock of Ages and faithfully enveloped me in prayer.
Ty Nichols: By the end of my senior year, I felt sick. I was ugly inside. I exchanged the truth of God for a lie and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator. I decided to go to a Christian college because I felt like that might fix me, and for a while it did. I love going to chapel, I loved hearing the music and I knew the Holy Spirit was at work, but Satan had a grip on me and the fool's gold of the world was too attractive and I fell right back into the same behavior patterns that I had when I was a senior in high school. Midway through my sophomore year, I left the Christian school, which is a miracle in itself because I knew that if I didn't change I was headed for destruction.
Ty Nichols: We've all read this story about the prodigal son who is lying in the mud with the pigs. And I found myself lying in the mud with the pigs. How did I get here? What happened? Well, I moved back guess where? Home. And I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was loved and cared for, and I got my first real job as a mail room manager sorting mail by zip code. Now there's a job. God was finally able to get me alone. There was no social functions, no parties, no workouts, no games, no crowds. And on Sunday evenings, I'd attend church at Horizon Christian Fellowship and it was at that time I could physically feel the forgiveness of God. God was carrying me on His shoulders on the wings of my mother's prayers.
Ty Nichols: I do know the pastor of Horizon Christian Fellowship prepared every sermon just for me. It was if he was speaking directly... I could see him back in his study before the sermon going, "All right, Lord, Ty's coming. What do we got for him tonight?" And he would hammer me with... Get this, he would hammer me with God's love and God's grace.
Ty Nichols: The favorite verse in the Bible for me is Romans 2:4 and it says that God's love leads one towards repentance, not God's punishment, not God's legalism, not God's rules, but God's love leads one towards repentance. I remember I'd try and find a seat. I mean, it's packed like this at Horizon on Sunday nights, and I remember trying to find a seat by myself because I knew I was going to break down. I couldn't handle it emotionally. And I didn't want to be seen, I was still worried about my image. But it didn't matter. As soon as Terry Clark would get up and start singing, I'd break down and cry. I cried tears of thankfulness that God still loved me, I cried tears of shame of what I'd done and I'd cry tears of awe that God still cared about me.
Ty Nichols: God had me under the microscope because my mother was in His ear every day and she wouldn't let God forget about me. Lord, please remember my son. Daily. Well God saved me. My King rescued me. He descended into the very hell I was in and He called me by my name and He reached out that nail scarred hand and He pulled me out of the pit and He embraced me with strong, loving arms. And He said, "Welcome home."
Ty Nichols: And my mom is still on her knees begging God for mercy and compassion and blessings for her son. And He's still shaping Patty and I, and He's still molding us, and I'm still not perfect. And I still have faults. As your brother in Christ, as your equal, let me give you some encouragement from one who has been rescued from the grasp of the roaring lion who seeks to devour whomever he can. Those of you mothers who may be struggling with the prodigal or who may have a son or daughter who is kind of like me, you can't see it but you know what's happening. There's no dramatic event in life, there's no major league happening, but it's a gradual slide down the slippery slope.
Ty Nichols: If they've been making decisions that are contrary to God's truth, here is my encouragement to you, first from me, then from the Lord. Mom, I love you. And you are the strongest person I know. Thank you. From the Lord, He says in Deuteronomy 32, and I'm going to paraphrase now, but this is the Lord's encouragement to you. He says, "I am your rock. My works are perfect. All my ways are just. I am faithful. I do no wrong. I am upright. I am just. I am your God."
Ty Nichols: Then in Deuteronomy 3:22, the Lord gives us an incredibly encouraging verse, especially in light of the discouragement that may have a tendency to slip into your thought patterns when you're waging the battle on behalf of your kids. It is humiliating. It is discouraging. We have this American dream that says we're supposed to have it all together, and the truth of it is 90% of us don't. But thank God He's graceful and patient with us all. But when you're in the midst of the battle and you're feeling the discouragement, Deuteronomy 3:22 says "Do not fear for the Lord your God will fight for you."
Ty Nichols: Think about that. Who do you want to step in the ring with? The Lord your God will fight. No, no, no, fight. He will fight for you. When you go to your next prayer meeting and when you drop to your knees the next time you feel discouraged, when you feel humiliated, when you feel disgusted, when you're ready to quit, when you feel the weight of Satan's minions pressing in on top of you to try and get you to stay off your knees because he's won the battle, you remember that the Mighty Warrior says, "I will fight for you. I will not stand idly by. I will not be a spectator in the bloodbath for your kids. I will fight on your behalf for your son or your daughter, and I will show myself strong for you."
Roger Marsh: If you've just tuned in, you are listening to Dr. James Dobson's Family Talk. That was a recorded message by Ty Nichols, the son of the founder of Moms In Prayer International, Fern Nichols. He gave this encouraging testimony to her at a Moms In Prayer International conference in Dallas, Texas.
Roger Marsh: Later, Dr. Dobson was able to talk to Fern Nichols by telephone to get her response to Ty's touching words, and we'll share that with you in just a moment. But first, here are some more encouraging words about parenting from Dr. Dobson.
Dr. Dobson: If you're the frustrated parent of a very rebellious and difficult child, stay tuned, I think I can encourage you.
Announcer: Here's Dr. James Dobson for Family Talk.
Dr. Dobson: I know there are times when you feel like throwing in the towel, but if you choose to remain steady, you will someday look back on this difficult period of conflict and be thankful that you stayed the course, that you continued to do what was right for your child. This era will pass, and more quickly than you think. The present stresses will one day seem insignificant and remote. What will matter to you then will be the loving relationships that you built within your family, even when other parents ran away or buried themselves in work.
Dr. Dobson: Does it help to know that in a survey of 3000 parents, fully 85% said that they had at least one strong-willed child who stressed them to the limit? You are not an exception or the butt of some kind of cruel cosmic joke. This is parenthood. This is human nature. Others have survived and you will too. Remember that you are not to blame for your child's inborn temperament, but he is in greater danger because of his inclination to keep testing the limits. That's why you have to establish your right to lead, don't panic, stay on your child's team even when it appears to be a losing team, and give the whole process time to work itself out.
Roger Marsh: Well that is certainly welcome advice for any parent who is in the middle of the ups and downs of parenting. And now we will close today's program with Dr. Dobson's telephone interview with Fern Nichols, the founder of Moms In Prayer International. Fern offers great encouragement for parents of prodigals as she tells a bit about her own journey with her prodigal son. Let's hear that conversation now, right here on Family Talk.
Dr. Dobson: Hello, Fern.
Fern Nichols: Hello.
Dr. Dobson: Oh how nice to talk to you.
Fern Nichols: Well, I tell you, you have just been so in my heart and my prayers. I mean, we just love you so much here and we just know that you are constantly under great attack and so we just lift you up and just pray that the Lord will continue to prepare tables before you in the presence of your enemies.
Dr. Dobson: You know Fern, it is an interesting experience because I came out of medical school in kind of a respected environment and to have a lot of hatred thrown our way is something you got to get used to, and I don't suppose anybody likes it, but you really only have to answer to the Lord.
Fern Nichols: Yeah. And to constantly keep that perspective, I know you need to have a lot of prayer because it still hurts. It's hard.
Dr. Dobson: Well, I'm learning how to deal with that.
Fern Nichols: Amazing.
Dr. Dobson: But it's also an honor to carry the banner and you have certainly done that through the years.
Fern Nichols: Well, Dr. Dobson, I am just so appreciative of the fact that you wanted to interview me personally. I just feel so honored. I do believe this is a message that is going to really touch thousands of mom's hearts. I mean, as I've been able to travel a little bit more, I am just seeing weeping mothers everywhere. They are just distraught over their kids.
Dr. Dobson: Well, why wouldn't they be? I mean the only way they can be together with the kids that they brought into the world is to win them to Christ, and if they don't get that done they'll never see them again. It is a scary experience, especially in a wicked world like the one in which we live.
Fern Nichols: I so agree.
Dr. Dobson: Now you must be, Fern, so very proud of Ty at this stage of his life.
Fern Nichols: I tell you, it is in great thanks to God and His grace and mercy and hearing so many prayers from this mom and many other moms as he was going through that finding his faith time.
Dr. Dobson: Did you despair at any time along the way?
Fern Nichols: Oh my goodness. There were times... I didn't know the depth of how intercessory prayer could be in the heart of a mom. It went to the stomach.
Dr. Dobson: Yeah.
Fern Nichols: It was just like what you said, the most important thing is that they are there in heaven, bottom line. And so sometimes when you don't see them making right decisions, you go to that place. Did they really make a decision for Christ?
Dr. Dobson: You were in the audience the night that he first shared this message, weren't you?
Fern Nichols: Yes. That's for sure. First of all, it was just the great joy of Jesus is the victor. Satan is defeated.
Dr. Dobson: You know, he has this marvelous message now and we just heard at least a part of it, of the necessity of fighting for your kids. You never give up, you never stop praying for them.
Fern Nichols: No.
Dr. Dobson: I know that you did that. You're a woman of prayer and you have helped to spread the prayer movement around the world and we appreciate you so much for doing that, Fern. But when it came home to your own family, where you had dedicated your life to this cause, to not lose your faith and to continue to believe and wait on the Lord, that should speak to an awful lot of people.
Fern Nichols: Well it truly is a testimony to a faithful God who keeps His promises. Because truly, Dr. Dobson, I just had to be in the word a lot because the truth of God's word is what kept me going in days when I felt like, my goodness, here I'm in a prayer ministry and my own child is not walking with the Lord. What's that all about? And the promise that He so gave me was that Luke 22:31, when Jesus prayed for Peter. And He said, "Peter, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. But I'm telling you, Peter, I'm going to pray for you that your faith won't fail and that when you return, you're going to strengthen the brethren."
Dr. Dobson: Wouldn't it be absolutely wonderful if the parents out there that are in despair today because their kids have gone into outbroken sin and just are living like the devil if they could hear the voice of the Lord saying, "I'm up here praying for you. I'm making the case for your child with groanings that cannot be uttered." Wouldn't that be encouraging?
Fern Nichols: Very encouraging. And I tell you there's times of certainly groanings.
Dr. Dobson: Fern, thank you for what you're doing. I'd love to have you back on the program, you're one of my favorite people and I just love what you've done through the years. In 30 seconds, tell me what Moms is doing now. Where is it and how's it going?
Fern Nichols: Well, I tell you, we are exploding worldwide. I mean we just can't hardly keep up with it. It's just amazing where God is taking this message. The verse I just gave you about that when Ty would return he would strengthen the brethren, he was asked to go with me to Ireland to speak to the women there. And I tell you, it was absolutely powerful because they would line up and talk to him concerning their own child. He'd pray with them, he'd hug them, he gave them that message that you heard, don't give up because God does hear and answer prayers. Love them unconditionally. Don't quit praying.
Dr. Dobson: That is the message, don't quit praying.
Fern Nichols: Dr. Dobson, this means so much to us, I can't even tell you. And can I just say a quick prayer for you?
Dr. Dobson: Please.
Fern Nichols: Heavenly Father, I pray that you would keep Dr. Dobson in the palm of your hand. You've engraved him there. You love him so. Lord, I pray that he would not be put to shame. I pray that the enemies, Father, that you would triumph over them in his life and that he would know his hope is always in you and that you will never put him to shame. But I just pray that you would continue to show him the way, teach him your paths, guide him into truth. Oh Lord, that he knows all the time that his hope is in you all day long, and that he has many, many people praying for him as he leads in this battle for our families. In Jesus' precious name I pray. Amen.
Roger Marsh: That was Fern Nichols, the founder of Moms In Prayer International praying for Dr. Dobson here on Family Talk. And earlier in the program, her son, Ty, paid her a very moving tribute to the power of Fern's prayer in his life when he walked away from the faith. We really hope that you've been blessed and encouraged by these words to stay in the fight for your children and never give up praying for them no matter what.
Roger Marsh: If you'd like to learn more about Moms In Prayer International, either to join a group or to start one in your area, you can visit their website at momsinprayer.org. And if you'd like to hear these words again or share them with a parent you know who really needs to hear that word of encouragement, you can visit us at drjamesdobson.org. While you're there, you'll find a link to download this broadcast and to share it with others. You can also find a link to Moms In Prayer International on our site, as well as many great parenting resources to help you stay in the fight for your children.
Roger Marsh: Now, you will also find a vibrant community on our Facebook page as well talking about this and other parenting issues that we discuss here on the program. You can join us at facebook.com/drjamesdobson and share your thoughts and ideas there.
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Roger Marsh: I'm Roger Marsh reminding you to come back again next time on Dr. James Dobson's Family Talk.
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