You talk and talk, but you partner just doesn't seem to comprehend. Have you ever had that experience? Well, maybe it's time you tried a new form of communication.
One very effective way to express your feelings is to paint a word picture. My good friends Gary Smalley and John Trent described this technique in their book THE LANGUAGE OF LOVE. They told of a woman who was feeling frustrated because her husband would come home from work and clam up. He had nothing to say all evening. Finally, his wife told him a story about a man who went to breakfast with some friends. He ate a big meal, and then he gathered up some crumbs and put them in a bag. Then he went to lunch with some business associates and ate a big steak. Again, he put a few of the crumbs in a bag to take home. When he came home that night, he handed his wife the little bag of leftovers. The woman told her husband, "That's what you are doing to me. All day the children and I wait to talk with you when you get home. But you don't share yourself with us. After being gone all day, you hand us a doggie bag and turn on the television set." The husband said hearing it put this way was like being hit with a two-by-four. He apologized and began to work on opening himself to his wife and family.
Word pictures. They are far more effective than a tornado of hostile words.
Home With a Heart
By Dr. James Dobson